Cabin Fever

Angel face - she radiates sweetness!

Well, it was bound to happen.  Despite popping 2000 IU's of vitamin D a day (sunshine in pill form, if you will), and despite recording all the episodes of "Modern Family" that our DVR can handle (good for laughs), and despite having the privilege to spend my days with the most joyful and amazing little person I could ever hope to imagine (it's almost impossible to be unhappy around her)...despite these things:  I have officially succumbed to cabin fever.

To be fair, I think that I have weathered this season pretty well considering I literally came from the tropics and landed in "Chiberia" during what is, quite possibly, the worst winter this area has seen in my lifetime.  Up until yesterday I rarely complained about the weather.  I tried really hard to keep a positive outlook and focus on the fact that "this is for the best" (because it is).  But the sub zero temperatures, the seemingly endless barrage of winter storms and snow, and the fact that the final weeks of growing and carrying two babies at once can really take a toll on a woman both physically and emotionally have gotten to me.  I am grouchy, moody, weepy and irritable.

While I do seem to be spending the bulk of my days parked on the couch barely able to muster the energy to make a sandwich, let alone run errands and get out of the house, I have been productive.  I've been working with an illustrator on a blog re-design which will encapsulate and reflect the changes in our family and allow me to expand my writing focus.  I have also been diligently working on an article that will hopefully be showing up in a sailing magazine in the near future (more on that when it's official). Working on these projects has given me focus and purpose, something that I desperately need in my life to feel fulfilled, but my lack of presence on this blog has gotten me in a funk.  Writing is essential to my happiness but with my energy stores at a bare minimum (sleeping comfortably these days has proven...challenging), finding the motivation to actually write in this space is hard.  I have lots of posts written in my head so they are bound to come out eventually, but it's taken me longer than I would like.  So instead, I dig into colorful bowls of rainbow sherbert and retreat into book #18 on twin rearing (no joke, it's getting ridiculous).

But enough of that, there is happy news too.  I have now reached 35 weeks in this pregnancy- no small feat when carrying twins - and I have reached this mile-marker while managing to avoid any complications whatsoever (knocking on wood).  I feel incredibly lucky, especially after reading and hearing so many stories about twin pregnancies that didn't bode as well.  I am still hoping to carry these girls "full term" or beyond (technically this is 37 weeks with twins, as opposed to 40 with 'singletons') but we shall see what the Universe has in store for us.  So far, there are no signs pointing toward an early labor and apparently the fact that I almost carried Isla for 42 weeks is a good thing.  The girls are also head down, clocking in at 5 pounds 2 ounces each and looking great.  It seems that my wishes to avoid a c-section as well as NICU time might be a possibility.  We shall see.  I am remaining hopefully optimistic but open to whatever will ensure that our outcome is two healthy babies.

Speaking of the babies, we thought we had their names selected (several times in fact), but we keep oscillating and, again, I find myself buried deep within the black hole that is the internet searching and researching names and their meanings which can be incredibly frustrating - particularly if you have been doing it for months and months.  We knew Isla was going to be "Isla" (eye-la) long before she was born and not having a clue as to what these girls will be named has me on edge.  Nothing is screaming at us, and if something does stand out - it's only doing so to one of us.  We just can't agree.  Too many syllables, too weird, too normal, too foreign, too made-up, too matchy, to cliche, too this, too that...the list goes on...I feel like Goldilocks frantically looking for names that are "just right."

So that's where we're at right now.  I've got some good ideas for meatier posts on more interesting subjects, but they'll have to wait until I get the inspiration and motivation to write them.  In the meantime,  I'm going to pop another vitamin D and pretend I am somewhere sunny.

At least these two enjoy the snow!

A little different than being buried in sand, wouldn't you say?

Here I am at 34 weeks, haven't yet taken the 35 week shot - later today...